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Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
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