and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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