So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
