halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Randomize