Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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