It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
