I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
