Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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