he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize