She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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