I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
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