She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
