So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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