her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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