If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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