I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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