All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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