You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
