it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
