Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
