just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
