I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
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