Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
