Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Randomize