This girl is more easily done than said...
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Randomize