Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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