I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
