Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
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