I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
she woke up with a sticky ear
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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