dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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