This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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