i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
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