When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
cat food counts as protein by the way
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
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