Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
