I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Quick, to the slutcave!
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
