He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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