We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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