he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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