You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
