hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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