I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Semen is not good for contacts.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
