Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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