I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
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