Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize