i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
