Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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