Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I forget how to act sober
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
