Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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