We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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