so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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