just tell him i said nine months
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
